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SELF - CONCEPT

SELF-IMAGE

Do you feel like a BIG NOTHING inside?? Maybe you're saying,
"I crave acceptance, but I feel worthless, incompetent, - A FAILURE, - I fear rejection! Inside me there's a terrible emptiness!"
It is true that each of us carries a portrait - a picture far more important than any photo we may have. That mental picture is our self-image. Research has shown that we tend to act in harmony with our mental self-portrait. If we don't like the kind of person we are, we think no one else likes us either, and so that belief influences our job performance, and ALL relationships.

Would you be embarrassed if your heart opened up and others could see what you think you look like? But we do need honesty with ourselves and others. To keep up appearances is a dangerous trap ! As the Bible warns, "Fear of man will bring a snare"; We dare not hide or rationalize our failures.

YOU CAN HAVE YOUR SELF-IMAGE CHANGED through understanding and applying the truth ! There's HOPE! You can learn to deal with failings without being devastated by them.

Let me show you how you can change your negative self-image by contacting me today!

A. DEFINE

1. Who am I?

a. Self-Awareness

b. Self-Concept

B. NEEDS

1. Security

a. Unconditional Love

b. Safety

c. Control

2. Significance

a. Unconditional Acceptance

b. Belongingness

c. Self-Worth

3. Example - "Adam's Stress"

a. Abuse

b. Neglect

c. Loss of Parents

d. Response:

  • Feels rejected; "I am unlovable."

C. DEFENSES AGAINST ANXIETY

EXAGGERATED NEEDS AS THE DETERMINANT OF PERSONALITY

KAREN HORNEY SEES A GENERAL PATTERN IN THE WAY A CHILD COPES WITH BASIC NEEDS WHICH BECOME EXAGGERATED BECAUSE OF PARENTAL REJECTION, RESENTMENT, OR RIDICULE:
1- A STRESSFUL ENVIRONMENT PRODUCES BASIC ANXIETY.
2- A STRATEGY IS DEVELOPED TO COPE WITH STRESS.
3- STRATEGY REDUCES ANXIETY.
4- THE STRATEGY MAY BECOME A GENERAL ORIENTATION TO LIFE; IT BECOMES COMPULSIVE AND INDISCRIMINATELY USED. [ Cited in DiCaprio 1974, 313 ]
THE NEED FOR A SENSE OF BELONGING, SELF-ESTEEM, OR CONTROL CAN BECOME SO STRONG THAT IT DETERMINES THE BASIC ORIENTATION A PERSON HAS TOWARD OTHERS. THUS IT CAN ACTUALLY BECOME THE PRIME DETERMINANT OF PERSONALITY.

1. Personality Traits Formation

a. Stress

b. Strategies to cope

c. Anxiety reduction

d. Compulsive

e. Indiscriminate

f. Rigid

g. Neurotic paradox

2. Fight (Aggressive Strategies)

a. Projection - Blame Others

b. Sarcasm

c. Clown

d. Verbal abuse - Insults

e. Cursing, anger

f. Fighting

g. Physical abuse

3. Flight (Withdrawl Strategies)

a. Denial

b. Guilt

c. Passiveness

d. Conform

D. UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE

1. Adoption - Ephesians 1:3-12

a. Unconditional love

b. Safety

c. Control

2. Gifted

a. Ephesians 4:7-13 - Purpose

b. Romans 12:4-6 - Grace

c. I Peter 4:10-11 - Significant

E. EDIFICATION

1. Helpful - Ephesians 4:29

2. Graceful - Colossians 4:6
 W. R. MERCER COUNSELING SOLUTIONS †

234 BRYN MAWR AVENUE, Suite 202
BRYN MAWR, PA  19010
610 357 8715     mercergo@gmail.com